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Would You Rather?

A Memoir of Growing Up and Coming Out

Audiobook
2 of 2 copies available
2 of 2 copies available
A collection of poignant, relatable essays from the author of Never Have I Ever about coming out in her late twenties, entering into her first relationship, and figuring out what it means to be an adult.
When Katie Heaney published her first book of essays, chronicling her singledom up to age twenty-five, she was still waiting to meet the right guy. Three years later, a lot changed. For one thing, she met the right girl.
        
Here, for the first time, Katie opens up about realizing at the age of twenty-eight that she is gay. In these poignant, funny essays, she wrestles with her shifting sexuality and identity, and describes what it was like coming out to everyone she knows (and everyone she doesn’t). As she revisits her past, looking for any “clues” that might have predicted this outcome, Katie reveals that life doesn’t always move directly from point A to point B—no matter how much we would like it to.
In a warm and relatable voice, Katie tackles everything from the trials of dating in New York City to the growing pains of her first relationship, from obsessing over Harry Styles (because, actually, he does look a bit like a lesbian) to learning to accept herself all over again. Exploring love and sexuality with her neurotic wit and endearing intimacy, Katie Heaney shares the message that it’s never too late to find love–or yourself.
Illustration © 2018 Neil Webb c/o the ispot
Advance praise for Would You Rather?

Would You Rather? is an extraordinarily generous and affecting book. Katie Heaney has written something with a remarkable amount of room in it—enough for anyone to spread out and connect with. It’s deeply felt, clear-eyed, joyful, and illuminating.”—Mallory Ortberg, author of Texts from Jane Eyre: And Other Conversations with Your Favorite Literary Characters
 
“Whether you’re single or in a relationship, whether you’re queer, straight, or questioning, whether or not you’re partial to Harry Styles—you will discover something relatable and self-affirming in this honest, heartfelt, hilarious memoir.”—Camille Perri, author of The Assistants 
“What does it mean to find yourself, to know who you are and walk boldly in that truth? Would You Rather? takes readers on that journey along with Katie, reveling in the relief and glee of finding your tribe and frolicking in the exquisite joy of being a woman who loves women.”—Jenna Wortham, staff writer at The New York Times Magazine and co-host of the podcast Still Processing
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    • AudioFile Magazine
      Katie Heaney wrote her first memoir at age 25 (NEVER HAVE I EVER). At that time she was still searching for the right guy to sweep her off her feet. Amid a lot of soul-searching over the next three years, she realized that she is a lesbian and that she was really looking for the right woman. In this essay collection, Heaney recaptures the anxiety and tension of having crushes and dating men. In contrast, her first real crush on a woman felt somehow right, even though she didn't quite compare to Heaney's crush on her favorite character in the television series, "The L Word." Heaney narrates her highly personal story with flair. Her sardonic sense of humor is highly audible. J.E.M. © AudioFile 2018, Portland, Maine
    • Publisher's Weekly

      November 6, 2017
      Heaney follows Never Have I Ever, a memoir about her dismal experiences dating men in her mid-20s, with an uneven second memoir in which she explores her attraction to women and describes how she settled into millennial lesbian-partnered bliss. Heaney offers her mostly unoriginal reactions to depictions of lesbians in the media (e.g., she was drawn to the characters in the television show The L Word) and to celebrities (“Queer girls who are into Harry Styles is a definite thing,” she writes on the topic of her male celebrity crush). Her analysis of her elementary school crushes is not all that revealing, as for example when she looks at the breasts of a foreign-exchange student staying with her family for “just a beat too long.” Heaney is most thoughtful when musing about her small-scale celebrity, which resulted from the success of her first memoir, and the “confessional responsibility” she has to her readers to inform them that she is no longer the person they read about in that book. As with her first book, this one feels undercooked; Heaney’s stories are fun and uplifting, but they lack introspection.

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  • English

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